Outside the Box – Football on TV: An evening of Eurotrash as United make their Channel 5 debut

European football returned to our screens last week as our plucky English clubs once more ventured to the four corners of Europe to mix it up with some of the mightiest names in continental football; goliaths such as Barcelona, Inter and FC Metalist Kharkiv could all be on the horizon. As the week b...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: No handshake for Evra and no love lost between the partisan pundits at Sky

Think about this for a second. How many times do you think you have seen Luis Suarez’s hand this weekend? Ten times? Twenty? A hundred? I’m sure I’ve seen his wandering hand more than I’ve seen my own two in the past 48 hours, such has been the swirling media-frenzy since he refused to settle his di...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Serious lessons to learn from Fashanu’s footballing family

I’m fairly certain we can all agree that football has its fair share of problems. If it is not the shady transfer dealings of murky agent types skulking around the bins at Tottenham’s training ground, it is the ignorant grunts of ill-informed morons as they boo a man purely for being the brother of ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A prosperous week for Liverpool in the cups but off the field is a different story

The days leading up to the weekend’s FA Cup Fourth Round ties were not particularly pleasant for many football fans, a week in which the unseemly and murky face of football was glaringly apparent. Many column inches were devoted to the tax-evasion trial of Spurs manager Harry Redknapp, as well as th...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Confusion reigns at City as Coleman fluffs his lines

Have you played Football Manager 2012? You may wonder how a game brimming with data, facts and incalculable statistics comes to contain such a dearth of information. Well, in the early stages of the games development, some spotty oik is charged with the task of finding someone close to each of the 7...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: An incident-packed week at the BBC leaves Savage short of support and Lineker lost for words

They say a week in football is a long time and it can certainly be said that there was enough controversy, incident and wonder crammed into the last seven days of football to keep Joey Barton’s Twitter account going for years. The fallout from the Manchester derby, the return of Scholes and Henry, t...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Manchester disunited but the magic of the FA Cup is alive and well

The much talked about magic of the FA Cup was present in abundance this Sunday during the huge third round Manchester showdown, in fact there was more magic contained in the 90 minutes than during a Paul Daniels swingers party. Chris Foy’s card tricks, a disappearing City captain and most mystifying...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A football overkill but Fabregas’ Barcelona adventure keeps us watching

At the top of this article you will see, if you can get past the crass, self-congratulatory overuse of my own name, that the tagline for this column mentions that there isn’t enough football on the TV. Obviously this pithy line is actually nonsense as there is in fact far too much football clogging ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Stelling and his merry mates bring festive cheer and genuine fear in the absence of any football

If we boil it down, there are two distinct ways to spend the festive period. You either endure the holiday wallowing in a pit of desperate desolation, alone with no hope of joviality, good tidings or communal kinship. Sat crestfallen in front of Eastenders on Christmas night, nursing a bottle of gin...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A battle of wits ends in defeat for Worthy’s warhorses, but football marches on

Let’s face it. Our footballing heroes don’t have the greatest reputation when it comes to brainpower and academia do they? A cautionary glance at the post-match interviews every week on Match Of The Day show us superstars struggling to grasp the complexity of questions such as, “How do you feel the ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A love-in for O’Neill as marvel Martin ruins Rovers’ day

It was clear at 1pm on Sunday what the overriding theme of the day was going to be on Sky Sports’ Live Super Sunday. Ed Chamberlain, growing more and more comfortably into the role of football anchorman, opened the afternoon’s football coverage by loudly proclaiming, “Sunderland’s new era begins tod...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: The rise and fall of the sprightly Savage is far from a waltz in the park

Do you remember the first time you ever saw Star Wars? That intoxicating and bedazzling rush of pure unadulterated excitement as you sat slack-jawed, unable to wrench your eyes away from all the bright lights, whizzing space ships and questionable acting? And perhaps you also remember the desolate f...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A hair-raising spectacle on Saturday turns to sombre reflection on Sunday

Take a look around you. Chances are that if you are reading this in a public place; a library, at your office while you should be working or perhaps even on the Tube, then someone close by is displaying some facial hair that seems to be a little out of place. These moustachioed menfolk are either un...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A test of comedy quizzing is passed with help from the inspiring Irish

Ok, before we go any further let me first congratulate the Irish team on their impressive qualification for the European Championships next summer. There was the inevitable party mood for the second leg of the Republic of Ireland v Estonia match last Tuesday and I’m sure there are not many that begr...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Spain conquered, but Fabio gets a reality check from a Spurs and England legend

I don’t know if you noticed but the greatest footballing nation of recent years popped over during the weekend. You could quite legitimately be forgiven for letting it pass you by though, as the life of an England supporter over recent times has left the vast majority of us bare husks, bereft of hop...

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Leicester City – Nigel Pearson, return of the king or a ghost that that should have stayed buried?

There’s an old adage that is often repeated in the world of football; you should never go back. Players are warned of the perils of returning to former clubs for fear of tarnishing their carefully cultivated reputations at past homes. And managers even more so, lest we forget the almighty car crash ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: ITV begin to repay their debt with a feast of Man City delights

It’s the 12th June 2010. Seven thirty-four on a warm summer’s evening. My friends and I are huddled around my television, just as a million more expectant eyes are doing at the same moment up and down the nation. Then pffft … nothing. A moment’s darkness was followed by some guff about Hyundai cars ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: A bad week for JT just gets worse and worse as the news hacks attack!

It’s been a bad old week for Chelsea and England captain John Terry hasn’t it? The on-going racism row between Terry and his accuser Anton Ferdinand has been front and back page news since the incident occurred a week ago and the story shows no signs of halting. Like most I have seen the footage...

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Arsenal, Coventry and Leicester: Can a new ground be blamed for a lack of success?

It has been a traumatic decade for followers of Coventry City. The Sky Blues were relegated from the Premier League in 2001 and in the proceeding 10 years the Midlands club have rarely threatened a return to the big time. You could argue that the club’s move to the Ricoh Arena has hindered their pro...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Mancini’s Manchester magicians spoil the party… and this column

Why always me? This week I was going to talk to you about the light-hearted Sky Sports knockabout quiz Take It Like a Fan. I was armed with reams of faint praise for the show and was readying my keyboard for a glittering review and even a possible recommendation for you all to check it out. But al...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Football on Sky is becoming a fairytale thanks to Wilkins the Wizard

So we were repeatedly told that it was the ‘biggest club game in world football’ as Liverpool and Manchester United met at Anfield on Saturday for the ever-intense North-West derby. The fevered atmosphere was apparent at Sky for Live Ford Football Special and there was an almost fairytale mood in ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Rooney and Savage liven up the tedious break in play

There are not many things that evoke a true hatred and frustration in my usually dreary and featureless disposition, in fact there are only three: anybody who thinks the enjoyment of a night out is heightened by the commencement of dancing, any television programme in which the words “Piers” and ...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Tevez, tantrums and Trigger? The pundits pull no punches when it comes to Carlos the Jackal

By the time this weekend came around I, like most, was sick to death of hearing about Carlos Tevez this, Carlos Tevez that, suspensions, fines, lip-readers, caveman, Aleksandar Kolarov, Argentina, Mancini. The whole overblown schism engulfed the country’s consciousness like some toxic mist and re...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: You’re On Sky Sports… or should that be Moron Sky Sports?

There are three clearly defined pursuits enjoyed by the average football fan. One, demonstrating the unwavering certainty that they know the best way for their team to play. Secondly, morphing into yob-like tyrants at the very sight of an opposition supporter and lambasting them with vociferous ange...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Morning Glory could soon be a thing of the past for the guys at Soccer AM

Morning. The time of day when we, as human beings, fall into two distinct categories. On one hand you may be an enterprising, full-blooded marauder, charging about here there and everywhere with an unbounded vitality and zest for adventure. Alternatively, you might be a feckless layabout. Those of u...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Dancing, glitterballs and very camp; and that’s just Clem at Football Focus

After the unwelcome interruption of the international break and all of the disappointing baggage it brings for England supporters, this weekend saw the glittering return of our domestic footballers into the spotlight. Over at Football Focus, the boys were practically giddy at the prospect of the wee...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Golden Oldies at Sky prove to be Masters

The legendary American comedian Bob Hope once quipped, “Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle”. This observation proved to be spectacularly apt as I tuned in to Sky Sports’ Grand Final Masters this weekend. If you’re unfamiliar with the annual Masters summer contest it runs...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Manchester United ensure a Super Sunday at Sky

This weekend brought with it the first meeting between two teams that finished in the top four last season, which inevitably meant that the Sky cameras were there for Live Super Sunday. Old Trafford was the setting for a fixture that always grabs the attention of any football fan. I was disappointed...

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Outside the Box – Football on TV: Strong Dispay by The Football League Show

If you think of Match Of The Day as the stylish kid who has all the best stuff, the coolest gadgets and the best Nike trainers as well as being unfeasibly popular; then The Football League Show is the nerdy boy that lives next door. Understated and slightly unfashionable, you’re more likely to see h...

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Outside the Box - Football on TV: Match of the Day hits the target . . . just

I spent this weekend at a music festival and alongside the obvious pitfalls of such an excursion such as fetid portaloo’s and beer that ranks alongside drainage water in both quality and taste, it also meant that I was indefensibly absent for the opening weekend of the Premier League season. Fortuna...

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Premier League preview (part two)

With only a matter of hours until kick off, we’d better get on with it. So here is the second part of my Premier League preview. Manchester City Key signing: Sergio Aguero The noisy neighbours are fast becoming neighbours from hell for Sir Alex Ferguson. Do not be fooled by the red herring of the...

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Premier League preview (part one)

Not too long now. After whetting our appetites with the intriguing opening weekend of the Championship and the entertaining Community Shield, the time has come for the big boys to leave their Twitter accounts alone and get back to work. At the time of writing there has been an incredible £280 millio...

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Championship Preview (part two)

Here we are, part two of my preview of the new Championship season. Hull Key signing: Paul McKenna (no, not that one) Nigel Pearson was an uncompromising, monosyllabic and tough centre-half as a player and has reinvented himself as an uncompromising, monosyllabic and tough manager. Never one to o...

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Championship Preview (part one)

As I have previously stated among the hallowed pages of SquareFootball.net, Leicester City are and always will be the grandest football team to play its football in this great country of ours. The coming season holds with it a renewed sense of hope and anticipation that has been sadly lacking in the...

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Leicester City – Sven’s revolution gathers pace

Paul Konchesky. Not immediately a name that will fill many of you with excitement, enthusiasm or indeed interest of any kind. Liverpool fans particularly are undoubtedly experiencing white-hot feelings of rage at the very utterance of his name – in fact I’m told that the word Konchesky has entered S...

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